Bachelor WTA: Two hours I will never get back

Welcome to Bachelor in Paradise auditions! Shoot I mean the Women Tell All. It can be confusing.

It’s always so fun to see what hair color the contestants come to the WTA with.

These arguments are loser on loser crimes and it pained my soul to sit through two hours of this nonsense. But alas, I pushed through. Let’s dodge, duck, dip, and dive right in.

First, we must acknowledge the following:

But she’s Cynthia Rowley’s daughter so it must be cool, right?

Jessenia calling MJ, Meredith really was one of the best quotes of the season. 

MJ and Jessenia are being pretty…civil…? 

Justice for Mari TBH. Gone too soon.

Victoria is basically saying to Ryann that her comments were only offensive because Ryann is sensitive…you can’t compare sensitivity levels. That’s unfair. 

Victoria claiming she did the best she could ??? I feel as though she could have done better…just my opinion…

Okay why are all the girls coming for Katie??? Katie didn’t make the house toxic!!! She had to tell Matt because no one was listening to her and she knew they would listen to Matt.

Brittany in the hot seat talking about sex workers: “There’s nothing wrong with that industry. It’s just not me.” Yes. girl. She is handling this extremely well.

Anna is owning up to her mistakes and said horrible things because of her own insecurities. Okay I felt like that was genuine but Twitter is NOT in agreement???

Brittany: “Nobody’s life is worth more or means less based on an occupation.” SAY IT LOUDER FOR THE PEOPLE IN THE BACK!

Katie looks HOT in that clip wearing the sequin dress on the longboard. 

Okay so apparently Katie and Matt actually had a connection?? We didn’t see jack shit. 

Katie is giving a Bachelorette speech. It always starts with “I just hope my person is out there somewhere…” AKA give me the job.

Matt really let us all down by not investing more in Abigail. 

Chris is low key obsessed with Abigail…

Pieper’s turn in the hot seat! Pieper, don’t worry this wasn’t a waste of your time, you gained thousands of Instagram followers and can now sell flat tummy tea! 

The awkward silence after the clips where Chris just stares at the women while they cry. I’m not even there and I’m uncomfortable. 

Matt comes out and looks like he’s been through HELL. We hate/love to see it.

Serena C to Matt: “Don’t judge me for how horrible I was on the show lol.”

K why is Victoria having a panic attack rn.

No no no no no not a montage of Matt’s eye open kisses.

Pieper is not believing anything that comes out of Matt’s mouth lol.

Why didn’t we see this scene with Tayshia or Jojo ?!? Looks better than the garbage we actually saw.

This episode was a complete waste of my time and I do not feel like we gained any new information as viewers.

One thing we did expect to see was Katie being announced as the Bachelorette per Reality Steve, however that was not shown leading me to believe that they took it away from her or that RS was given false news.

Ugh I’m exhausted. These next two weeks better be the best fucking episodes of television that I’ve ever seen. TTYL betches.

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