YOU GUYS WE MADE IT! I don’t know how, but somehow the Bachelor Finale is here. This is arguably my favorite day of the year (besides my bday…iykyk) so I go HARD. I’ve been pregaming since noon. JK. Kinda. There is so little to say, but at the same time so much??? For the last time this season, let’s pencil dive in…
Matt: “I’m all in with both of them.” Well, um, I hate to break it to you, but that’s not going to work…might want to reconsider!
Wasn’t it just fall in Nemaocolin last week? We have now entered the tundra.
Michelle Meets Matt’s Family
Matt’s mom is already crying. Michelle is perfect.
I didn’t peg Matt’s brother for a white wine guy… I’m into it.
Patty: “Michelle is amazing.”
Matt: “yeah…I… like… her.”
NO NO NOT MATT STROKING HIS MOM’S LEG. This guy’s love language is def physical touch, but like…with his mom??? That ain’t it Matthew James.
Rachel Meets Matt’s Family
Matt is just INFATUATED with Rachel.
I’ve always wanted to know what’s inside those gift bags that the women bring to the Bachelor’s parents. Anyone have any insight?
Matt’s brother is really reading off the notecard the producers gave him of questions to ask lol.
Poor Patty, she feels emotions so deeply and that can be exhausting.
Patty’s wearing an engagement ring??? We missed something!
I was shocked to see Chris when he knocked on Matt’s door. LOL I forgot this was prerecorded.
Michelle’s Date
Michelle is rappelling down a building in heeled boots! What can’t this girl do!
Pretty boring date overall…nothing substantial during the day portion.
The JERSEYS she brought BYE I’M CRYING.
No no no no no Matt’s about to break her heart. I can’t handle it.
Matt’s mom’s words about love not being enough really did a number on him. She should have had that conversation with him BEFORE he agreed to be the Bachelor. I think they both need some therapy sessions to work through Matt’s father’s impact on both of their lives.
The past three seasons there has only been one person going into the final rose. Just some food for thought.
Rachel’s Date
JK! No date for Rachel. Ok this does suck for her though. The person she wants to be engaged to the next day can’t even talk to her…
Well, well, well, look who’s at the door! Neil Lane has been quarantining for days he is NOT leaving Nemacolin without a mother freaking ring sale.
Matt looking at engagement rings: “Can I touch it?”
I feel like we aren’t ending in a proposal…he has totally talked himself out of it.
I really miss guessing which contestant’s foot it stepping out of the limo first. Such a hype moment.
Wait now he’s talking like he is proposing?!? And loves her?! Did he just have a complete 180???
The Final Rose
The producers didn’t show any of this proposal setup in the previews!! Those little bastards. Love the roaring fire though.
Okay soooo Matt is pulling a Nikki & Juan Pablo here…no engagement but remain girlfriend and boyfriend.
Matt looked like he was struggling to say I love you. Something feels off about this. Maybe it is just because we now know so much about Rachel that we look at her differently.
After The Final Rose
Welcome Emmanual Acho! What the fuck is going on with that suit though. I’m worried his biceps are about to pop out at any given moment.
Michelle looks fire. She is ROASTING Matt. I love it. I bet when she saw him come out with that beard she was thanking her lucky fucking stars they didn’t end up together.
YES MICHELLE “I hope you get another phrase besides ‘thanks for sharing that’” LOL. Sav.
Herrrrreeeeeee comes Rachel.
Well, they aren’t together anymore. Not super surprising after everything that has come out in the past few weeks.
Rachel looks lost, exhausted. Matt looks angry, frustrated, sad.
He definitely still has feelings for her though because when she is crying, his heart is hurting, but he doesn’t want to feel bad or let her make him feel like he is causing the tears.
Do we think Matt broke up with Rachel partly because he felt public pressure? He maybe wanted to make a stance that her actions were not okay, so he had to do it? I don’t think he broke up with her just because of the antebellum party insta picture; I think the problem was that he had to EXPLAIN to her why it was wrong. Matt didn’t want to take on the responsibility of educating her.
Emmanuel Acho spitting. straight. facts. He is also asking very PERTINENT questions, but I feel like Matt is kind of dodging them?? He seems like has a lot to work out in his head.
Emmanuel is acting like Matt is dying and these are Rachel’s last words to him. He keeps saying “you’re never going to see him again” lol.
Emmanuel: “so if you guys want to have one final embrace…” Matt is NOT into it. He’s so done.
In conclusion:
This season may seem like a waste of time (which in part it was), but it really was a catalyst to look into the racism of this franchise. They were forced to look inward and make changes that should have been made years ago.
Well, we’re on to Katie as the Bachelorette! Her season will probably air around the end of May. I’m excited. I think she will bring a fresh perspective. AND this fall we get Michelle!!! She was born to be the Bachelorette.
Thank you to everyone who reads these chaotic recaps every week…I appreciate you! Enjoy the break…we sure as hell deserved it. Until next season betches!
Want more content during the offseason? I got you! Check out my latest post on bikini must-haves for the summer here.