I seriously do not understand how Monday has the AUDACITY to sneak up so fucking fast on me every week. Nevertheless, here we are! Again! Let’s pencil dive in…
Well, well, well, if it isn’t Victoria reminding us why we hate her in the first one second of the episode. She seriously is asking Katie for an apology for telling her to stop being so mean to Sarah now that she left? I am just…speechless…
Sooo I guess we are having a group date? But no day portion? Kk.
MJ gets some good airtime on the date and seems to be in a good headspace about the show. She understands that good things take time and are not going to be easy to get. Preach sista!
Queen Chelsea with the incredible facial bone structure FINALLY has a convo with Matt. She talks about how emotional having black hair is and I am increasingly proud of these women for talking about REAL problems and for ABC actually airing them!
Lol Matt calls Chelsea’s night one dress the “bam bam dress.” That’s one way to describe it!
Bri gets the group date rose and I just stan her harder than ever before. She’s so leetle!!!!
Rose Ceremony
Pieper finally getting some airtime! These girls are just coming out of the woodwork tonight. Who woulda thunk it!
Matt claiming he loves being around Kit. I am just not convinced of that Matthew!
Oh Katie, honey, you’re not doing yourself any favors with that dress and hairstyle. That dress needs to go back on the clearance rack at the pop-up prom shop in the mall and the hair stylist at the kiosk in the middle of the mall needs to be FIRED. Love you though! Just looking out for ya!
Chris definitely waited until Victoria was talking to Matt to come get him. Reason number 82739 why he is the greatest of all time.
New Girls Coming In
Matt is literally like what the actual fuck. His tie is choking him and he is doing everything in his power not to pass the fuck out.
Brittany – 23, model
I HATE THIS TYPE OF ENTRANCE! She is kissing Matt without even asking if he wanted to! Imagine if a guy did that to a girl….
Magi such a queen making room for the new girl to sit on the couch with them.
Michelle – 27, teacher. OH she cute, cute. And Matt posted a picture of her entrance on his Instagram…what does it mean?!?!?!?!!?
Ryan – 26, dancer/choreographer
Kim – 28, ICU nurse. I strive to have the confidence Kim has wearing a dress that shows her FULL stomach.
Catalina – 29, former Miss Puerto Rico
Catalina, I’m sorry, but if you don’t realize you were only cast to piss off Victoria….
Omfg Victoria actually took the crown RIGHT OFF CATALINA’S HEAD! This girl has NO shame.
Okay I totally get why the girls who have been there for three weeks are upset about new girls coming in, but it’s not the new girls’ fault!! It’s not like they CHOSE to come in late! IF you want to blame anyone, blame the producers.
Anna is clearly insecure about Brittany and frustrated that her relationship with Matt is not as strong as she hoped it would be at this point. But Brittany literally did nothing wrong when she came in…
All five new girls get a chance to talk with Matt, nothing notable except that Michelle looks just like Mila Kunis.
Wow what an intense rose ceremony full of Anna’s resting bitch face!
Going home are Khayla, Kaili, and Kim. If your name starts with a K, GOODBYE.
Group Date
BEN HIGGINS IM CRINE. To all my friends, if you want to set me up with a guy, LET BEN HIGGINS BE YOUR EXAMPLE OF MY TYPE.
Okay this date was .. quick? Seriously not much content came out of it.
We cut to the cocktail party and this is where the REAL shit starts.
Brittany interrupts Anna’s time with Matt and Anna is set off. She starts to swirl around the rumor that Brittany is an escort.
These girls have got to point their anger towards the new girls in a different direction. THEY. DID. NOT. CHOOSE. TO. COME. IN. LATE! Period!
Matt taking a page out of Tayshia’s book shouting out his top three before giving out the rose. Throws me off every time!
After Matt leaves, Anna addresses Brittany about her potentially being an escort. This conversation really should have happened in private and not in front of the other girls. Or on live television for that matter!!! Anna is making a huge claim that could ruin Brittany’s career and personal life. I am not here for this and I don’t think anyone in Bachelor Nation is.
Anna is upset and is lashing out, but this is too far.
Michelle’s One On One
What a great date. Wholesome and good energy between the two of them.
The producers totally just slid binoculars into the house and “suggested” the girls go use them and look outside. Matt and Michelle just happened to be on a hot air balloon at that exact time!
The night portion of Michelle’s date is E V E R Y T H I N G. Usually the contestants on these type of shows feel like they don’t even live in the same world as us viewers. But the past two seasons, ABC has done an outstanding job of airing real-life conversations that are relatable to the viewer.
I love hearing Michelle talk about her role as an educator during COVID. Standing O for all you educators, you the real MVPs.
We cut back to the house where Katie gives us another look into how MOTHER FREAKING MATURE SHE IS defending the new girls and encouraging all of the women to be more welcoming towards them.
Group Date
Omfg they are seriously not going to make the women fight each other. Why!!!!!!!!!
Okay once again there is literally no substance on this day portion of the date. We get shown maybe 2 minutes of an entire day.
WELLS is back back!!! Is this “bring all the precious gems from The Bachelor to work day” ??
Holy fuck Katie and Jessenia are going at it.
Matt james acting shocked. Like what do you expect!!!
Pieper just came out of nowhere tonight! Getting in two solid conversations with Matt. She moved up in the rankings for sure!
Matt: “I wanna keep this good night going.” NO NO Matt don’t say that! It’s a trap!!
*ensue bad things happening*
Katie being the voice of reason amongst the other BULLIES in the house. This is what happens when you cast women who are in their early twenties. They are too close to high school and clearly have not matured beyond that!!
Usually it is not good for contestants to talk about other girls with the lead, but I think Katie is doing the right thing here. She feels alone because she is the only one standing up for what is right, and she needs Matt in her corner because the girls will actually listen to him.
WHEW that was quite the episode. A few relationships progressed, a few took some steps back, and a whole lotta mean girls emerged. This episode really brought out the worst in some of the girls, and they are going to have a hard time watching it back. Hopefully it is a learning experience for all!
I leave you with this: it doesn’t cost anything to be kind 🙂